fasting...

i remember so distinctly the first time i heard about fasting. i was in fifth or sixth grade and kathy, phil, and oliver were in my living room. they were talking with my dad about fasting. i remember thinking they were insane. why would anyone purposefully not eat? why would they want to deprive themselves? what possible lessons could one get from it? it wasn't until much later that i found answers for those questions.

i think most people have misconceptions about fasting. i know i certainly did. they either give it too much credit or not enough. i know for me, learning to give something up has always been a difficult lesson to learn.

last year when i was running 30 Hour Famine with my jr. highers i had a lot of people express that they didn't think jr. high was an appropriate age to teach about fasting. they said they didn't think kids that young could really understand what they were doing. my initial response to that is introduce me to an adult who really understands what they're doing when it comes to God. but i explain that i think jr. high is an age when you still believe your faith can move mountains and so it's an age that you actually get to see the mountains move. my students work hard at 30 Hour Famine, in a lot of ways they work harder than the older kids and adults who do it with us.

tomorrow we begin our 30 Days of Awareness. this is an idea i got from blake and its brilliant. for the next 30 days (we're a month away from the famine) all students participating in 30 Hour Famine will go through a devotional book, asking them to fast from other things. a day without sarcasm, a week without tv, a day without vanity, etc. this booklet begins to prepare their hearts and minds for 30 Hour Famine.

so, below i am listing the things we'll be fasting. if you want to join us in this exercise we'd love to have you. it's a great way to draw closer to our God and it's also a great way for you to partner with me and my kiddos. if you want the devotional book that comes with this, let me know and I'll email you the file. some of the items may be hard to grasp without the devotional.

- 2/9: fast from comfort (sleep on the floor)
- 2/10: fast from music
- 2/11: fast from choice (let someone else make your choices for you)
- 2/12-2/13: fast from tv
-2/14: fast from vanity (don't use a mirror)
- 2/15: fast from sarcasm
- 2/16-2/18: fast from the internet
- 2/19: fast from excess (leave 5 items at home, i.e. chapstick, jacket, wallet, cell phone, water bottle)
- 2/20: fast from junk (no junk food)
- 2/21-2/22: fast from showers
- 2/23: fast from greed (spend absolutely no money)
- 2/24: fast from warmth (leave your jacket at home)
- 2/25: fast from isolation (visit a neighbor, or spend time with a friend)
- 2/26: fast from credit (take no credit for anything you do today)
- 2/27-3/1: fast from ignorance (research a social justice issue)
- 3/2: fast from sleep
- 3/3: fast from people (spend some one-on-one time with God)
- 3/4-3/6: fast from hurry
- 3/7-3/10: fast from insecurity

Veg-Head

in youth group the kiddos and i have been talking about self-discipline. partly because 30 Hour Famine is upon us and partly because its a good conversation to have with teenagers (frankly its a good conversation to have with adults). i've been encouraging my students to find ways in their lives that they can begin to practice this idea. but i think that an important part of leadership is showing your students that the talks you give and the bible lessons you teach, apply to everyone. so i've been looking for a way to practice what i preach.

hence for the month of february i will be a vegitarian. its something i've been wanting to try for awhile. i already love veggies and i find myself having lunch at green temple more often than i like to admit. but i also love me some red meat, chicken, pork, and above all else: FISH! so i have put off my little experiment because i haven't wanted to deny myself. but lately i have been thinking that a little dip in DE-NIAL (haha, get it? DE-NIAL/DE NILE) is good every once and awhile.

check back here for updates on how it's going. tonight is my last meal of delicious meat until march 1st.

30 Hour Famine...

when i began the process of preparing my church for '30 Hour Famine' i was consumed with "doing". there were literally 161 items on my '30 Hour Famine' TO DO list. over 3 months i was busy, busy, busy. and yes, there were moments when i stopped to think about the impact we could have or the ways that God could speak to us. but if i'm honest i very rarely thought about those things.

so friday, march 26th rolled around and i began fasting. i had talked the with students about fasting a lot. we'd talked about how it was a way we could find more intimacy with Christ. we'd had conversation after conversation about how God can be made strong in our weakness. but most of friday passed and i found myself simply 'not eating' and not really 'fasting'. then 6pm came. and in walked some of these faces:

they came hungry. they came energetic. they came armed with stories of how food had tempted them throughout the day but they stood strong. and a little piece of me began to remember why "30 Hour Famine" is powerful.

throughout friday night we played games and watched movies. as a leader i had planned a schedule that i hoped would inspire just as much as it instructed. i wanted the students to know uganda. short of actually going, i wanted them to be able to taste it. so i showed them some short films that invisible children produced. they were powerful stories. the students got caught up in them. after the games and videos we moved on to our craft. this is what the jr. highers have titled "tommy's blankey". they each decorated a quilt square and we're sending the quilt to the orphanage that jeff and amy got tommy from. the things the kids wrote were so beautiful and simply sweet. my favorite one was: "you live here (a picture of africa). i live here (a picture of the us). God loves us both (a picture of a heart)."

by the time saturday rolled around i was exhausted. my tummy ached, my head ached, and my energy level was definately way down. i walked into the church in the morning ready for "30 Hour Famine" to be over. and then the students started arriving. i could hear them talking with each other as i set some stuff up. here's a paraphrase of one of those conversations:

Ben- I am starving!

Dillon- No Ben, you aren't. The kids in Uganda are.

Ben- You know what I mean.

Dillon- Yeah, I know what you mean, but I don't think we should say we're starving anymore.

Ben- Yeah, maybe you're right. Hey, do you think this money is really gonna help any kids?

Dillon- I dunno. Maybe.

Ben- You know what would really help them?

Dillon- No, what?

Ben- If we went to Uganda and taught them to skate.

Dillon- Dude! Totally, let's do it.

Ben- Think Chelsea would take us?

Dillon- As long as it's ok with our moms why not? But we probably need a lot of money so we should start saving.

Ben- OK, I bet we can be ready by next month.

that conversation is why i do what i do. because a relationship with God is more than just loving God. it involves loving others too. these past 3 months i have seen my students slowly start to get it. the way they talk about tommy like he's their own little mascott of love. they way they ask me if God could drop some food on haiti. they are starting to put the pieces together on their own and its wonderful.

we ended "30 Hour Famine" with a handcraft. 25,000 people die each day because of hunger related issues. my kids made 2500 handprints and i told them each hand represented 10 people that died because they didn't have enough food. but i told them the hands represented something else too. each hand represented the effort and love with which they had entered the "30 Hour Famine". i told my students that with each hand they should remember they are changing the world. and they are. they really are.

i was beyond exhausted when i got home late saturday. but i had started the weekend with no thought of my Jesus and i ended the weekend completely safe in his embrace. completely sure of the cross. completely convinced that there isn't a single statistic on this planet that is stronger than my Lord. and as if those lessons weren't enough: i ended the weekend knowing that someday God's gonna have hold of my students' hearts the way He has mine.

hole in my heart...

Isaiah is my absolute favorite book of the Bible. It is the place I go for strength and courage. The words I find there consistantly challenge me and grow my faith. In my favorite book of the Bible there is a chapter; a seemingly small chapter. It is in this chapter that I hear my calling. It is in this chapter that I know how to throw myself into the work God has for me.

My heart always aches to be in Africa. I'm not ever truely whole until I'm there. But usually its a dull ache that I can ignore. Lately though I haven't been able to. My dreams are a world away. I wait on pins and needles for the day when the Lord says I can go there and never come back. So this morning in an effort to soothe the pain I'm meditating on Isaiah 61 and the above picture of my heart. Join me.

The Year of the Lord's Favor

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.

They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devestated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devestated for generations. Aliens will shepherd your flocks; foreigners will work your fields and vineyards. And you will be called priests of the Lord, you will be named ministers of our God. You will feed on the wealth of nations, and in their riches you will boast.

Instead of their shame my people will recieve a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will rejoice in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting joy will be theirs.

For I, the Lord, love justice; I hate robbery and iniquity. In my faithfullness I will reward them and make an everlasting covenant with them. Their descendants will be known among the nations and their offspring among the peoples. All who see them will acknowledge that they are a people the Lord has blessed.

I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. For as the soil makes the sprout come up and a garden causes seeds to grow, so the Sovereign Lord will make righteousness and praise spring up before all nations.

yesterday...

at the end of this month my students and i will be holding an event called "30 Hour Famine". it's purpose is to raise awareness and funds to fight world hunger. the basic idea is that we will get our friends and family to sponsor us a dollar amount for each hour we fast. for example i'm fasting 30 hours and my good friend Tyler hellinga is giving me $3 for every hour fasted. then we send that money to Uganda through world vision. i've done this event before and it's a great way to help students and leaders see the world around them with more compassionate eyes.

anyway, yesterday in preparation for the famine i was watching some videos i bought from invisible children (http://www.invisiblechildren.com/). i'm going to be showing some of these videos throughout the event and i wanted to make sure they were jr. high appropriate. i spent about 2 hours in my office just crying and crying. and there were a lot of reasons for those tears.

i think the most obvious reason is that my heart just can't comprehend how we can be so cruel to each other. you can get way more detailed thoughts on that throughout my blog. but there was something else. when i was 15 years old i went on my very first mission trip to mexico and while there i saw a movie about the aids crisis in africa. and ever since that night, ever since i first heard the call for help my whole being wants to respond. if you know me, you know that i end up bringing up the topic of africa in almost every conversation. i can't help it. the person that God made me to be is screaming to do something; to love more completely.

watching the videos from invisible children reminded me that i have left so much work unfinished. i have left children, who are longing to be held and i have left mothers with too much work to do alone. its interesting to me that i got a heart for this wild and untamed continent while sitting in a room a world away. i guess that's why we do the famine, because who knows how God will touch the hearts of my students.

so i would like to ask all of you that read this (i actually have no idea if its more than haley, carlee, and amy) please be praying for me and my kiddos on march 26th and 27th. pray that God would let His spirit fall on RLC. ask Him to change lives and hearts. and maybe through your prayers and God's diligent work we will find that my students grow a heart to change the world, just like i did.