The Apocalypse- Pt. 4

Hi All:

Here's the latest... Tyler Nazarian's much anticipated Apocalypse List! Only a few more days to turn in your submissions! If you haven't been following the story from the beginning here's your chance! Read this, this, and this!

Love to you,

Chelsea

Apocalypse Now

Written by: Tyler M. Nazarian

Ok, here's the deal... as soon as my sister and Aaron started discussing this end of the world apocalypse situation and what group of 10 people could survive the longest, it Chelsea about 5 minutes to call and fill me in. Needless to say being the planner that I am, I've already had a working list on this exact topic for some time now.

The first thing we need to clear up is the scenario. This is an apocalypse situation. This is not a zombie or vampire situation. In my scenario, there has been some sort of catastrophic global disaster, similar to the movies: The Postman, The Book of Eli, or the TV show Jericho. My team of ten is a group best suited t survive in the barren wasteland that remains. If we were attempting to outrun zombies or fend off vampires, this list would look quite different. I just wanted to clear that up prior to the reveal that way we're all on board.

Now in reading some of the other lists out there I've noticed that some people have gone to great lengths to try and be funny, or to bring along loved ones, or not to hurt feelings; this will not be my list. My list may hurt feelings, people might feel left out, I did not bring someone just because they are my friend or a loved one. My list represents what I believe to be the best culmination of skills needed to survive and flourish in this harsh new world. Just know this friends, if you are upset that you have not made either mine or anyone else's lists, it might be time for you to go learn some useful skills. Again, not trying to be funny... I am 100% serious. Now to the LIST!

GUYS:

1. Bryan White:

First choice is a no brainer, if he is not on your list you're not going to make it out there very long. I have seen this man go camping and not bring enough food to eat. This is not because he is an idiot, it is because he was so confident in his skills as a fisherman that he felt he didn't need food- he could find his own. This type of confidence and determination is exactly what we need. Also, he is a genius, and the ninja turtles would have been screwed without Donatello, and so would we. Bryan... you're in!

2. Aaron Bensoua:

Bryan may have a ton of ideas, but I need a guy who can think logically and analytically to help come up with truly solid strategic plans. I don't like to jump into anything without thinking it through and neither does Aaron. His cool headed thinking compiled with his physical strength and abilities could go a long way. Not to mention, if anyone slide tackles his ass, he'll kick the crap out of them. I like your passion Benzo... You're in!

3. Matt Janosov:

Though most people know Matt as the upfront leader, he actually has another role that he fills even better. Matt is a one man support system. If you need help with a project or task, look no further than Cotton Candy Head. Matt can lend a hand with almost anything. He would be extremely useful around camp and would make a decent medic. His ability to remain level headed would be invaluable and on a personal note, I need a close friend who always has my back. Matt... You're in!

4. Tyler Hellinga:

What the hell are all you out there thinking not bringing this guy?! DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO TYLER HELLINGA IS?? He is Mr. Disaster scenario. Tyler would be the ultimate scout, tracker, solider, and partner. He wanted to be a navy seal for years. Tyler is literally the perfect person to bring. We got the brains and the heart, now we're bringing in the heavy artillery. Tyler... of course YOU ARE IN!

5. Marcus Enfiedjian:

and in the final round of the 2011 Apocalypse draft, Tyler Nazarian pulls the ultimate trump card. Every group needs a go-with-the-flow guy who is extremely helpful and useful but never complains. I present to you: Marcus! Yes, he is a perfect fit for the easy going hard worker, but now let me explain his real role. If you saw the movie Troy then you will get this. If you didn't see it, stop reading this, get a Netflix account and start spending your time in a meaningful way, you Loser! Anyway, at the beginning of Troy there are 2 huge armies about to fight, but the kings decide that in order to spare some bloodshed they could just have their best fighters duel it out, last man standing wins. Enter Marcus Enfidejian, the National Champ. He would be our ace in the hole, just in case we ran into some other not so friendly roaming nomads. Marcus- The Champ is IN!

LADIES:
1. Rachel Nazarian:

I know I said in the beginning that this is not about martial commitment and guess what- it still isn't! I married Rachel because she is freaking awesome and of course I want her with me. Not only can she cook, which seems to be the only thing people remember about her sometimes, she is organized and handy. I've worked alongside her in Mexico building houses and we could definitely use her skills. Not to mention, if she is there I know I'm gettin' some (ya know what I'm saying...)!! Rach, Baby... you're in!!

2. Jenna Quan:

I see that most of you have her on your lists. Good job, you're not an idiot. Jenna is amazing and awesome and she has to be there. She is a hard worker who is strong and can carry her own weight. Also she has a very positive attitude about almost everything and is always sincere. This new world doesn't need a bunch of fake people telling you just what you want to hear. Jenna will tell it how it is but always manage to do it with love. Jenna is awesome and every team needs her supportive demeanor. Jenna... You're in!!

3. Danielle Quan:

Yeah, that's right- you were thinking, "Man how can this awesome list get any better?" Well insert another Quan! Danielle is strong and athletic. She has a good heart with a tough exterior. Also she has worked in a physical therapist office for awhile now, so she could help with the inevitable aches and pains we're bound to get. DQ... You're in!

4. Amy Rosinsky:

The last thing any group needs is a power struggle. How do you prevent that? Stop bringing so many people who want to be in power. Sometimes if you have too many Chiefs, you need to bring an Indian (I apologize if you take offense to that statement). Amy is a hard worker who is quite content in that role. She reminds me of Jennifer Grey from Red Dawn (again if you haven't seen it... You Suck). She is soft spoken but has a hidden fiery passion for life. She would make a great worker and fighter if need be. I trust Amy and trust is huge. So Amy... You're IN!

5. Daisy:

Here's the thing, I asked Chelsea if I could trade in some of my girl picks for more guys and she said no. In reality Daisy probably won't be that useful, but honestly not many other chicks would be either. Sorry... well... kind of. I figure that if it's between having a somewhat helpful girl around who is another mouth to feed or having my dog to play with and keep me happy and sane, I choose the dog. Sorry girls, I choose my dog- who can't do much- over all of you. Hahaha Daisy... You're In!

Well that's it. There's my list. If you think you're better suited than any of these, let me know who and I'll consider it. Honestly, a big part of me agrees with Aaron, and wants to create some sort of huge catastrophic global disaster just to try out my list. If you're in, let me know and we'll figure something out.

Oh! And in case you wanna know what I'm going to be doing... I'm leading the team. If you wanna know what qualifies me, here are 5 good reasons...